Fix Smile Order Chapter 1: The flying dragon is in the sky

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景隆七年,天下太平。

In the seventh year of Jinglong, the world was peaceful.

一早,唐天远像往常一样去翰林院应卯。夏日已至,天也长了,他出门时,太阳已经冒出半个头,红彤彤地散着光芒,像是一只炙热的手掌,温柔地抚摸这个世界。

In the morning, Tang Tianyuan went to the Imperial Academy Yingmao as usual. Summer is here and the sky is getting longer. When he went out, the sun had already risen halfway, glowing red, like a hot palm, gently touching the world.

你问他是怎么看到太阳的?

How did you ask him to see the sun?

因为他站在墙上……

Because he was standing on the wall…

唐天远并非有什么特殊癖好,他以前也是爱走正门的。只不过现在……他扭头往东边望去,果然不出他所料,门口挤了几辆马车。

Tang Tianyuan doesn’t have any special hobbies. He used to like to go to the front door. But now… He turned his head to look east, and as expected, there were a few carriages crowded at the door.

马车有的朴素有的奢华,还有一辆垂着粉红色的流苏,装饰着鲜花,生怕别人不知道里头坐的是女人。

Some carriages are simple and luxurious, and there is one with pink tassels hanging down and decorated with flowers, for fear that others will not know that a woman is sitting in it.

确切地说,这些马车里头的应该全部都是女人。

Precisely, all of these carriages should be women.

唐天远背着手,虽站在墙头上,丰姿依然不减半分。他抬头,静静地望着天上被太阳染了一层赤铜色的鱼鳞云。微风徐徐吹过,鼓动着他的衣袍,空气中飘着不知名的花香。他闭上眼睛,深深吸了一口气,心情因这沁人心脾的花香而稍稍好了一些,嘴角弯起一个微小的弧度,但随即像是想到了什么,使那弧度很快又压了下来。

Tang Tianyuan had his hands behind his back, even though he was standing on the wall, his beauty was still not reduced by half. He raised his head and quietly looked at the copper-colored fish-scale clouds in the sky that were dyed by the sun. The breeze blew slowly, stirring his robes, and the air was filled with the scent of unknown flowers. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, feeling a little better because of the refreshing floral fragrance, the corners of his mouth curved a slight arc, but then he seemed to think of something, and the arc was quickly suppressed again.

两年前,唐天远二十岁,在殿试中发挥正常,高中探花,春风得意自不消提。

Two years ago, Tang Tianyuan was twenty.

按照惯例,一甲前三名——也就是状元、榜眼、探花,是要一起游街的。戏文里都说状元是“一举成名天下知”,不过这一次,探花郎抢了状元的风头。原因很简单:三人之中,探花最好看。

According to the convention, the top three in the top 1 – that is, the champion, the second place, and the third flower will be paraded together. In the play, it is said that the champion is “to become famous all over the world”, but this time, Tanhua Lang stole the limelight of the champion. The reason is simple: among the three, the third flower looks the best.

唐天远本来就长得一表人才,尤其是眉宇间那股英气,随便往人堆里一放,都能立刻制造鹤立鸡群的效果。状元是个四十多岁一把胡须的,榜眼五短身材外加皮肤黑得很匀称,跟这俩人一对比,唐天远更显得俊美无俦了。

Tang Tianyuan has always been a talented person, especially the heroic spirit between his eyebrows. If he puts it in the crowd, he can immediately create the effect of standing out from the crowd. The champion is in his forties and bearded. He has a short stature and well-proportioned dark skin. Compared with these two, Tang Tianyuan looks even more handsome.

同时,唐天远被京城老百姓津津乐道并深深铭记的还有他的家世:他是内阁首辅的儿子。

At the same time, Tang Tianyuan was talked about and deeply remembered by the people of the capital as well as his family background: he was the son of the cabinet chief.

内阁首辅就相当于丞相了,绝对的柄国之臣,一人之下万人之上。唐天远有这样一个爹,还能自己发奋读书考中进士,可见此人是好学又上进的。再与京城里一班镇日只知斗鸡走狗喝花酒的纨绔子弟相对照,唐天远的形象简直要光芒万丈了。

The first assistant in the cabinet is equivalent to the prime minister, the absolute minister of the country, one person under ten thousand people. Tang Tianyuan has such a father, and he can study hard and pass the Jinshi exam himself, which shows that this person is studious and motivated. Compared with a group of scoundrels in the capital who only know how to fight cock-fighting lackeys and drink flowers and wine, Tang Tianyuan’s image is almost radiant.

相貌好,家世好,人品也好,又有才华肯上进。这简直是女人们的终极择偶标准。

Good looks, good family background, good character, and talented and willing to make progress. This is simply the ultimate mate selection criteria for women.

刚好,唐天远尚未娶妻。

Just so, Tang Tianyuan hasn’t married yet.

于是,登门给唐天远说亲的媒人渐渐多起来。这也没什么,男大当婚女大当嫁嘛。可是也不知道从什么时候起,唐府门口便聚拢了一些慕名而来的姑娘,专等着唐天远出入时一窥他的英姿。她们都坐在马车里,并不露脸,只在唐天远路过时才撩起车帘看一看,伴随着莺莺恰恰的娇笑。

Therefore, the number of matchmakers who came to tell Tang Tianyuan about their relationship gradually increased. This is nothing, men should be married and women should be married. But I don’t know since when, some girls who came to Tang Mansion have gathered at the gate, waiting for Tang Tianyuan to catch a glimpse of his heroic appearance when he came in and out. They all sat in the carriage and did not show their faces. They only lifted the curtains of the carriage to take a look when Tang Tianyuan passed by, accompanied by Yingying Chacha’s charming smile.

一般在这个时候,唐天远总是低头猛走,假装什么都不知道。个别姑娘胆大些,于唐天远路过时故意在他跟前丢个手帕荷包什么的。对此,他只好装瞎。

Usually at this time, Tang Tianyuan always bowed his head and walked away, pretending that he didn’t know anything. Some girls were more daring and deliberately threw a handkerchief and purse in front of Tang Tianyuan when he passed by. In this regard, he had to pretend to be blind.

他觉得她们大概只是一时兴起,等风头过去,也就清静了。

He thinks they are probably just on a whim, and when the limelight passes, they will be quiet.

很快他发现他实在太天真了。

Soon he finds out how naive he is.

唐府门口的马车越来越多,连后门都不错过。人一多了,成分就复杂了,有人甚至看到连青楼的女子也跑来围观。终于,有些不怎么在乎名节的女人不甘于只是远远地看着,开始走出马车调戏唐天远了。

There are more and more carriages at the entrance of Tang Mansion, even the back door is not missed. The more people there are, the more complicated the composition is. Some people even saw the women in the brothel come to watch. Finally, some women who didn’t care much about fame and festivals were unwilling to just watch from a distance and began to get out of the carriage to molest Tang Tianyuan.

是真的调戏啊,不独言语轻佻,且还有上手摸脸的。可怜他唐天远活了二十多年,尚未真正碰过女人,陡然被一帮姑娘这样调戏,实在窘迫难当。可这种事情又不好报官,他一个大男人,也不能与女人们争执,只好远远地躲了,躲不过,干脆翻墙。

It’s really flirting, not only with frivolous words, but also with hands touching his face. Pity him, Tang Tianyuan, who has lived for more than 20 years, has not really touched a woman, and was suddenly molested by a group of girls like this, which is really embarrassing. But this kind of thing is not easy to report to the official. He is a big man, and he can’t argue with women, so he has to hide from a distance.

其实,无论唐天远多么出挑,单凭他自己,是无法造成这种离奇场面的。导致唐天远名气越来越大且仰慕者众的,另有原因。

Actually, no matter how outstanding Tang Tianyuan is, he alone cannot create such a bizarre scene. There are other reasons for Tang Tianyuan’s growing fame and admirers.

想到这个原因,他更觉无力,真是提也不想提。

Thinking of this reason, he felt even more powerless, and really didn’t want to mention it.

唐天远站在墙头上忧伤了一会儿,便赶紧跳下来,抄小路去翰林院了。他家离翰林院不远,骑马值不当,他也不爱乘轿子。

Tang Tianyuan stood on the wall and was sad for a while, then quickly jumped down and took the path to the Hanlin Academy. His home is not far from the Hanlin Academy, and it is not worth riding a horse, and he does not like to take a sedan chair.

翰林院对面有个书店,这会儿还没开门,但门口已经聚了不少人,排了长长的队伍。想必是在抢购什么好书。唐天远好奇地往队伍里一扫,看到排在最前面的赫然是曾经与他同科、现在是他同僚的榜眼兄。

There is a bookstore opposite the Hanlin Academy. It hasn’t opened yet, but a lot of people have gathered at the door, forming a long queue. I must be snapping up some good book. Tang Tianyuan swept across the team curiously, and saw that at the top of the line was the second-ranked brother who used to be the same as him and is now his colleague.

唐天远走过去,与榜眼兄打了个招呼。

Tang Tianyuan walked over and said hello to the second brother.

榜眼兄正在吃包子,看到唐天远,欢快地问他要不要吃包子。唐天远摇头问道,“你们在这里排队买什么?”

The second brother was eating buns. When he saw Tang Tianyuan, he cheerfully asked him if he wanted to eat buns. Tang Tianyuan shook his head and asked, “What are you lining up to buy here?”

“好书!”榜眼兄两眼放光地答,“是妙妙生的新书《唐飞龙风月剿匪记》。”这书名有些刁钻,像是绕口令,榜眼兄说得甚是吃力,喷了好几下口水。

“Good book!” The second-ranking brother replied with bright eyes, “It’s Miao Miaosheng’s new book “Tang Feilong Fengyue Suppressing Bandits”.” The title of the book is a bit tricky, like a tongue twister, what the second-ranking brother said. Difficult, sprayed several saliva.

唐天远掏出手帕在脸上抹了一把,眯着眼,咬牙。

Tang Tianyuan took out a handkerchief and wiped it on his face, squinting and gritted his teeth.

妙、妙、生。

Wonderful, wonderful, raw.

他咬牙的声音被人群的交谈声掩盖,榜眼兄的心思都在包子和书上,并未发现唐天远的异常,他又说道,“其实这本书在别处也可以买,但今天这家书店卖的可是独家题诗版,每一本书的扉页都有妙妙生的亲笔题诗,还盖了私印。全京城独一份儿,只此一家别无分号……你来一本不?”

His gnashing of teeth was drowned out by the chatter of the crowd. The second brother’s thoughts were all on the buns and the book, and he didn’t notice Tang Tianyuan’s abnormality. He added, “Actually, this book can be bought elsewhere, but today this The bookstore sells an exclusive version of inscribed poems. The title page of each book has a poem inscribed by Miao Miaosheng, and it is also stamped with a private seal. It is the only copy in the whole capital, and there is no semicolon in this one… You come Not one?”

正说着,书店开门了,因外面排队的人太多,伙计只好在门口支了桌子,摆上一摞一摞的新书。封面上几个字正是令唐天远不忍细看的“唐飞龙风月剿匪记”。

As he was talking, the bookstore opened. There were too many people queuing outside, so the guy had to set up a table at the door and put stacks of new books on it. The few words on the cover are exactly “Tang Feilong Fengyue Suppressing Bandits” that Tang Tianyuan couldn’t bear to take a closer look at.

人群一阵骚动。排在榜眼兄身后的一个人听到他们的交谈,眼神不善地看着唐天远,“你想插队吗?虽然我们都知道,唐飞龙就是你唐天远,但你也不能插队。”

There is a commotion in the crowd. A person behind the second brother heard their conversation and looked at Tang Tianyuan badly, “Do you want to cut the queue? Although we all know that Tang Feilong is your Tang Tianyuan, you can’t cut the queue.”

“我不插队,你们继续。”唐天远扭头想走。

“I won’t cut the line, you guys continue.” Tang Tianyuan turned his head and wanted to leave.

“别走!”榜眼兄十分仗义地一把将他拉回来,一边掏出一块银子抛给书店伙计,“我买两本!”

“Don’t go!” The second brother pulled him back with great loyalty, while taking out a piece of silver and throwing it to the bookstore clerk, “I’ll buy two!”

伙计收了钱,笑道,“荣您惠顾,一个人最多买三本,您再来一本不?我省得找钱了。”

The guy took the money and said with a smile, “I’m honored for your patronage. One person can buy up to three copies. Would you like another copy? I’ll save money.”

榜眼兄便拿了三本书离开队伍,把其中一本塞到唐天远怀里,“别跟我客气。”

The second-place brother took three books and left the team, and shoved one of them into Tang Tianyuan’s arms, “Don’t be polite to me.”

谁跟你客气了……唐天远甚是无语,想要把书还给他,但是他打死不收了。

Who is being polite to you… Tang Tianyuan was speechless and wanted to return the book to him, but he was beaten to death and refused to accept it.

唐天远就这么拎着本烫手的书进了翰林院。他实在不理解为何有这么多人愿意多花两三倍的价钱,只是为了多买一页题诗。那个妙妙生是个变态,写的字能好到哪里去。唐天远想到这里,故意把书翻开,想鄙视一下妙妙生的书法。

Tang Tianyuan just carried this hot book into the Hanlin Academy. He really didn’t understand why so many people were willing to pay two or three times the price just to buy an extra page of poems. That Miao Miaosheng is a pervert, how can his writing be so good. Thinking of this, Tang Tianyuan deliberately opened the book, wanting to despise Miao Miaosheng’s calligraphy.

……竟然还不错。

…it’s not bad.

唐天远自己在书法上颇有些造诣,名气也不小,这会儿看到妙妙生的字,虽写得有些急,但风清骨峻,自成一格,很不一般。

Tang Tianyuan himself is quite accomplished in calligraphy, and his reputation is not small. Now I see Miao Miaosheng’s calligraphy. Although it is written in a hurry, it is clear and strong, and it is very unusual.

代笔,一定是代笔。

Ghostwriting, it must be ghostwriting.

他把书扔在桌上,随手抽了一本其他的书来看。

He threw the book on the table and picked up another book to read.

而榜眼兄已经迫不及待地坐在自己的公位上,两眼放光地翻开了他的宝贝新书。

And the second-place brother couldn’t wait to sit in his public seat, opening his precious new book with bright eyes.

唐天远和榜眼兄同期授的翰林院编修,职位相当,所以共用一个办公房间。两人公位相对,平时只要一抬头,就能看到对方。按榜眼兄的说法是,每次抬头都能看到一个比自己英俊一万倍的人,他必须找点精神支柱才能活下去。于是他遇到了妙妙生。

Tang Tianyuan and the second-ranking brother were the editors of the Hanlin Academy at the same time, and they had the same positions, so they shared an office room. The two are facing each other, and usually they can see each other as long as they look up. According to the second-place brother, every time he looks up, he can see a man 10,000 times more handsome than himself, and he must find some spiritual support to survive. So he met Miao Miaosheng.

这个妙妙生,可不一般。他出现的时间是唐天远高中探花、名扬天下后不久。没人知道他的生平,也没人见过他的真容,可是一提到他的名号,却又如雷贯耳。这妙妙生写过几本话本子,虽也是风月小说,但不同于一般的才子佳人,里头的男男女女形象十分真实丰满;情节也别致、出人意表;另有一些清新可颂的诗词,满足了高雅人士们的需求。是以他的书在这两年很是风靡,每次有新书出来,都会引发抢购热潮。这自然是各地书商们乐见其成的。

This wonderful life is not ordinary. The time he appeared was not long after Tang Tianyuan High School was the third flower and became famous all over the world. No one knows his life, and no one has seen his true face, but when he mentions his name, it is like thunder. This Miao Miaosheng has written several storybooks. Although they are also novels of Fengyue, they are different from ordinary talents and beautiful women. The images of men and women in them are very real and full; the plots are also unique and unexpected; meet the needs of elegant people. Therefore, his books have been very popular in the past two years. Every time a new book comes out, it will trigger a rush to buy. This is naturally what booksellers everywhere are happy to see.

妙妙生的书之所以这样火爆,有一部分原因是借着唐天远这股东风。他的每一本书,主角的名字都叫“唐飞龙”。《周易》上说,“飞龙在天”,唐飞龙可不就是指唐天远么。当然,这样解释未免牵强,但只消翻开书看一看,便知分晓。那唐飞龙与唐天远出生年月相同,同样是内阁首辅的儿子,也同样是弱冠之年考中探花,其他一些细节也十分相近……这还不够明显吗?至少绝大多数人读妙妙生的书时,都会不自觉地把唐飞龙想象成唐天远。

Part of the reason why Miao Miaosheng’s book is so popular is due to the popularity of Tang Tianyuan. In each of his books, the protagonist’s name is “Tang Feilong”. “Book of Changes” said, “The flying dragon is in the sky”, doesn’t Tang Feilong mean Tang Tianyuan? Of course, this explanation is far-fetched, but you only need to open the book and read it to know the difference. Then Tang Feilong and Tang Tianyuan were born in the same year, and they were also the sons of the first assistant in the cabinet. At least when most people read Miao Miaosheng’s books, they unconsciously imagine Tang Feilong as Tang Tianyuan.

因此,妙妙生的书与唐天远这个人,两者之间产生一种很奇妙的相互推动的作用。正是托了妙妙生的福,现在想给唐天远生孩子的人数不胜数,连起来可以绕京城三圈再打一个蝴蝶结。所以唐府门口能够聚集那么多人,还有些着三不着两的跑来调戏唐天远,也就不奇怪了。

Therefore, there is a wonderful mutual promotion between Miao Miaosheng’s book and Tang Tianyuan. Thanks to Miao Miaosheng, there are countless people who want to give birth to Tang Tianyuan’s children, and they can tie a bow tie three times around the capital. Therefore, it is not surprising that so many people can gather at the gate of Tang Mansion, and some of them come to molest Tang Tianyuan.

人怕出名猪怕壮,身为名人就要付出点代价,这个道理唐天远懂,他真不介意自己被人写两笔,可是那个妙妙生都写了些什么东西!第一本书里,唐飞龙表面是个谦谦君子,但骨子里喜欢被女人调戏;第二本书,唐飞龙是个弱质公子,走三步路咳半口血的那种;第三本书更奇葩,唐飞龙直接被写成了神经病,白天是一个人,晚上是另外一个人。现在写到第四本,唐飞龙开始剿匪了,剿匪就剿匪,关风月什么事儿!

People are afraid of being famous, pigs are afraid of being strong, and being a celebrity has to pay a price. Tang Tianyuan understands this. He really doesn’t mind being written twice, but that Miao Miaosheng has written something! In the first book, Tang Feilong is a modest gentleman on the surface, but he likes to be molested by women; in the second book, Tang Feilong is a weak boy who coughs half a mouthful of blood while walking three steps; the third book is even more bizarre, Tang Feilong was directly written as insane, he was alone during the day and another at night. Now that the fourth book is written, Tang Feilong has started to suppress the bandits, and suppressing the bandits will suppress the bandits, what is the matter with Guan Fengyue!

以妙妙生之恶趣味,唐天远真不知道他这次会写点什么,总之他是不忍心看的。

Tang Tianyuan really didn’t know what he would write this time with the evil taste of Miaomiaosheng, in short, he couldn’t bear to read it.

抬头看看对面的榜眼兄,他倒是看得十分投入。因太过兴奋,榜眼兄蹲坐在椅子上,一手持书,另一手捂着嘴巴,两眼冒光,发出一阵阵痴笑。那动作,那表情,配上那黑得浑然天成的气质,真像是齐天大圣见到了中意的母猴子一般。

Looking up at the second-place brother on the opposite side, he was very engaged. Because he was too excited, the second brother squatted on the chair, holding a book in one hand and covering his mouth with the other, his eyes glowing, and bursts of smirk came out. That action, that expression, and that black and natural temperament, it was like the Great Sage Monkey King had seen his favorite female monkey.

唐天远更不忍看他,于是低了头,扶着额头发呆,目光又落在桌上那本《唐飞龙风月剿匪记》上。

Tang Tianyuan couldn’t bear to look at him even more, so he lowered his head, held his forehead in a daze, and his eyes fell on the book “Tang Feilong Fengyue Suppressing Bandits” on the table.

终于,他把手伸向了它。

Finally, he reaches for it.

每次都这样,每次都这样!唐天远在内心绝望地狂喊。他每次都不想看,可每次都禁不住去看!

Every time, every time! Tang Tianyuan shouted desperately in his heart. He didn’t want to watch it every time, but he couldn’t help but watch it every time!

把书翻开,开篇竟然十分正常。这不像是妙妙生的风格。唐天远提着一颗心往下看,看到第三章,妙妙生终于忍不住露出了真面目。唐飞龙身为朝廷命宫,在剿匪过程中竟然落入匪徒之手,这不是重点,重点是那匪首他是个断袖。这断袖黑老大把唐飞龙脱光了绑在床上,正欲行那苟且之事时,被本书女主角及时赶到,营救出来。

Opening the book, the opening chapter turned out to be quite normal. This is not Miao Miao Sheng’s style. Tang Tianyuan looked down with a heart, and when he saw the third chapter, Miao Miaosheng finally couldn’t help showing his true colors. Tang Feilong, as the imperial palace, fell into the hands of the bandits in the process of suppressing the bandits. This is not the point. The point is that the bandit leader is a broken sleeve. The black boss with broken sleeves stripped Tang Feilong naked and tied it to the bed. When he was about to do that unscrupulous thing, the heroine of the book arrived in time and rescued him.

脱、光、了、绑、在、床、上……

Take off, light, get off, tied, in, bed, on…

像是完成某个仪式一般,唐天远长出了一口气,缓缓把书合上。才第三章就出现这么刺激的剧情,他实在没勇气看下去了。

As if completing a certain ceremony, Tang Tianyuan let out a long breath and slowly closed the book. There was such an exciting plot in the third chapter, and he really didn’t have the courage to watch it any longer.

说实话,唐天远怀疑那个妙妙生是个喜欢搞断袖的变态,正常男人写的风月小说不是这样。唐天远看妙妙生的书,总有一种被变态盯上的不适感。这书里的黑老大八成就是那妙妙生的自托,想借书里的情节过一把变态的瘾。

To be honest, Tang Tianyuan suspects that Miao Miaosheng is a pervert who likes to cut off his sleeves, which is not the case in Fengyue novels written by normal men. When Tang Tianyuan read Miao Miaosheng’s book, he always felt the discomfort of being targeted by perverts. The black boss eight achievements in this book are the self-support of Miao Miaosheng, who wants to borrow the plot in the book for a perverted addiction.

唐天远一不小心就脑补了一个一脸胡子满面油光猥笑着奋笔疾书的老男人,登时遍体生寒。

Tang Tianyuan accidentally made up his mind about an old man with a grizzled beard, a grumpy face, and a wry smile.

他真的快忍不下去了。

He really couldn’t take it anymore.

       

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